I had a hard weekend.
Mostly because of Bradley's breathing.
All of Saturday and part of Sunday morning, he was holding his breath occasionally.
He'd skip 5 or more breaths.
And when he'd finally breath again, he'd gasp for air.
And he did not cry. It was like he was okay without getting air.
It's was a hard 36 hours for me.
And on Sunday morning, we were getting ready for church, even while Bradley gasped for air.
And I asked Tom if he wanted to open a fast with me.
I asked him what he wanted to fast for.
And he shook his head and said with a chuckle, "I don't know."
And I said I wanted to fast for Bradley again.
Fast for the 22nd month in a row for my Son.
And we knelt by the bed, and we offered a prayer and both of us sobbed the entire time.
And Bradley lay on the bed near us and heard our petition to God.
And I'm certain he heard our tears too.
And when we finished I sat and held Bradley's hands to my face.
To my tear soaked cheeks.
And I bathed his hands and his arms in my tears.
And I whispered in Bradley's ear that I was okay if he had to go do the work in heaven now.
And I told Bradley I would be coming right behind him.
That I would see him again.
By this time we were already very late for church.
And Bradley was still gasping for air.
And I told Tom we needed to just go!!
It's not like Bradley was bothered by the breathing troubles.
And that he would be fine at church.
But I NEEDED to go.
And we faithfully went.
And somewhere between sacrament and Sunday school, Bradley stopped with the breathing tricks.
And I finally could breath too.
Jacob and I were talking tonight before bed.
I asked Jacob what he knew about heaven.
He told me he knew Bradley was going there.
And I asked him how he knew that.
He said that there are three kingdoms,
and during the judgement,
kids like Bradley will get to go through a little door to the best kingdom.
I asked him where he had heard about this door;
And he said it was just something he knew as he shrugged his shoulders.
I think I know about that door too.
And I'm certain Bradley will be whisked right through that door.
I have to make it back with him!!
And I think he wants to know for sure I am coming behind him, before he can go.
Bradley, I'm coming.
I promise you.
I will!!
