Sent to Excel

Before we decided to get pregnant for the fourth time,

we seriously talked about adoption.

We talked about it being a way that we could guarantee a brother for Jacob.

What silly plans I had.

We were very close to starting the process.

But I chickened out because it IS such a process!

And for us it was easier to just get pregnant.

And I knew that Jacob would get his brother either way.

Wether we made his body or someone else made his body. 

And I remember telling a close friend that this next child was meant to be in our lives.

And then when we were in the NICU on a sybling visit day,

there was a woman and two girls who had come to see their brother.

It was a Sunday and they had just come from church.

And I could tell they were LDS too.

She told the social worker that they didn't know the babies last name
but they were here to meet the brother they were hoping to adopt.

AND I KNEW

then and there
BRADLEY WOULD HAVE
 come to us naturally or through adoption.

And that this was the body he was supposed to get.

 Even if it wasn't a body that I normally made.

Lately my Young Women have been learning the following song for Young Women's in Excellence.

"Sent to Excel"

 by Christy Riches Hinkson

Sent to excel.

I am a part of Father's Plan.

I'm here to do the things that I am finding out I can.

Sent to excel.

I'm getting better every day.

 I'm here to learn and grow and follow those who show the way.

I wasn't sent, to stay the same.

To be my best is why I came.

And so I search, and soon I see, the excellence inside of me.

Sent to excel.

With a desire to be much more.

I feel unsettled with, what I have settled for before.

Sent to excel.

I feel a striving from within.

Pulling me upward.

Whispering that I was born to win.

I wasn't sent, to stay the same.

To be my best is why I came.

And so I search, and soon I see, the excellence inside of me.

Sent to excel.

I'm getting better everyday.

Sent to excel.

Sent to excel.

I've been thinking about my mission here on the earth.

If Bradley never has a normal brain and

is therefore not tested in this life,
I know it will guarantee his salvation.

And he will be YET ANOTHER reason for me to WANT to make it.

I will want to be with him and so I will want to live my life accordingly.

 Heavenly Father wanted to give me another reason to comeback to him,

and so he sent me Bradley.

And because of Bradley I WILL excel.