Monday, March 26, 2012

Find Our Legs

We have been trying to apply for help from the government.
Our insurance has a very high deductible and we could be paying $10,000.00 in
medical bills, every year for Bradley, with out the help.
When we were released from the NICU, the social workers
said we were auto-eligible for disability because of the g-tube.
But the US Government is giving us the run-around.
We received back our application last week and it said they needed our
 birth certificates to prove our citizenship.
Tom's Mom brought him a folder the next day with his important documents.
Amoung other things, the original copy of his patriarchal blessing was inside the folder.

Last night Tom sat down with me and showed me what was in the folder.
His pediatric shot record.
His birth certificate.
And the blessing.
He read me the part about me and the kids.
It's such a special part of his blessing.
About a paragraph long.
It says that I'm a beautiful woman.
It calls our children "choice spirit children"
It also says that they'll be given a chance at mortality.

I told Tom I knew that the patriarch saw Bradley in his
 hospital bed when he was giving Tom that blessing, 15 years ago.
Tom thinks so too.
Tom told me that we were meant to be together.
He got tears in his eyes as he talked about how I had come to
 Las Vegas to meet him, so we could have all these children.
 Bradley too.
He said he knew we were meant to be.
I told him, I knew that too. 

I was meant to be Bradley's Mother, long before I was created.
And I came to the perfect parents who prepared me for these challenges.
Who recognized I was tough.
Who fostered that in me.
Who taught me to work and to embrace things that are hard.
And Tom was meant to be his Father.
He has a nurturing soul.
And he has helped me the most through this trial and

At PT today, the boy triplet Joey, had two physical therapists working with him.
He had his walker and was using it to walk.
They had tied his legs with long yellow strips of fabric.
One therapist was in front of him with toys telling him to walk to her.
The other therapist was behind him, pulling on the yellow strips of fabric,
creating resistance for his legs.
They told him he could.
Yet they had tied his legs so he could not.

And I think this is what Heavenly Father does to us.
Sometimes he ties us in ways that may seem mean and cruel.
Yet he's in front of us yelling:
"You can do this! You can!"

And we've just got to keep going. And trying. And not cry.
And eventually we will find our legs.
And they will be stronger than we ever knew they could be.