Special Love

I've been thrust into this special needs world, that I never anticipated being apart of.

And before I was in it, I didn't get it.

 

I've been surprised how much my heart aches for Bradley.

How this love has overcome me; I'm not sure.

Except he's the only one who is always just out of my reach.

Not doing what I want, whenever I want him to.

I am so subject to him.

Making my heart yearn.

 

I honestly love all of my kids to the same degree.

But the love Bradley and I share, is so different than ANY love I have EVER had.

Not romantic. Not parental.

Special love.

 

 

Coming close to death was a sanctify experience for me.

 



 

Bradley's O2 needs have gone down!!

Tonight my head is finally feeling relief. 

He is not requiring help to breath during the day!

 I thought my sweet boy was going to die last month.

That there was no earthly future for him.

I am so grateful to still have him!

 

 

 God has really hit me hard with this kid.

Up to this point, I have never had to yield to ANYONE like this.

This love squeezes my heart so incredibly hard.

 

 

I am feeling the sun on my face again.

I am starting to have hope again.

My thoughts are thinking of his future again.

I think, I may actually get to raise him here.

 

 

Bradley, stay with Momma.
Stay close.
Please stay.
I've been pleading whispers in his ear for a year now.

I'm glad he got to stay.