Sunday, October 14, 2012

Help to Raise a Family

Yesterday we went to Winco to get some food storage stuff.
We have not been food storage shopping since before
Bradley was born and my grocery bill was showing it.
Convenience foods are expensive and so bad for our bodies,
but you do what you gotta do,
and I've not really had time to cook between appointments, hospital stays, and bolus feeding Bradley.
And so in an effort to lower the grocery bill, I'm going back to good ole' cooking from scratch!!
I think I'm ready for it again.
 I have missed good food.
As we were nearing the end of our adventure,
(and it is an adventure to be in a busy store on a
Saturday with three walking kids and one in a stroller with tubes hanging off,
whilst packing a boat-load of cans in your shopping cart)
I caught notice of the sweetest old couple who was pushing a middle aged disabled child.
She looked like she could have a syndrome of some sort.
Definitely disabled and in a wheel chair.
And her Momma's arms were incredibly fit and toned for her age.
They all looked very happy.
Not nearly as stressed as us.
Old Dad was pushing the cart full of groceries.
The disabled girl sat happily in her chair.
Big lips and thin hair.
Small head too.
And something about her reminded me of my sweet boy.
So innocent! So happy!
For the remainder of the shopping adventure,
 we kept passing them in the aisles and I could not help but look.
I kept trying to figure out if I could tell what she had.
She could have had Downs Syndrome, but I wasn't sure.
Maybe Microcephaly, although not severe.
Maybe just low on the charts for head size, like Bradley.
Tom caught my eyes and gave me a 'stop staring' look and I realized I was being a bit rude.
And I wondered why they were not looking at my special child,
although right now he still just looks like a baby with lots of tubes.

And as we were leaving, she caught glimpse of me, and waved to me.
And I felt like I have known her for a very long time.
And I've been thinking about her all night.
And I've been thinking about us and our future, if Bradley lives a long time.
And I keep thinking about his baby blessing and a line from it,
 when my Mother, who was sitting next to me, shot me a look of shock.
Tom said that Bradley would grow up and help to raise a family.
At the time I had hopes that he would raise a family of his own someday.
But I'm not so sure of that now.
At this point I'm envisioning Bradley being middle aged and disabled,
and Tom and I helping him the remainder of his life.
And when my daughters have babies and I go to stay with them,
I think I will be bringing along Uncle Bradley.
And all the kids and their kids will know Uncle Bradley and will help him too.
And that is how Bradley will help to raise a family.
He will be raising all of us around him.
I am grateful for my glimpse of the future last night.
Grateful God is helping to prepare my mind.